In March last year, we made the difficult decision to pause operations at the Coach House, from the end of May. This pause gave us space to listen carefully and to discern a way forward amid significant financial and human challenges. We are deeply grateful for the patience, encouragement, and thoughtful engagement of our supporters during this time.

Over these months, the Board has met regularly, giving considerable time and energy to prayerful listening, discerning, and planning. This has been a process of careful tending and, necessary pruning. While some aspects of the Coach House’s life will look different in the future, we believe that the way forward offers genuine hope and the potential for fruitfulness in the years ahead.

From mid-March, the Coach House will reopen for retreats and other events that support spiritual growth and flourishing. We will welcome groups and organisations to hire the premises to run their own activities, with responsibility for their programme and catering. Nancy Billias will continue in her administrative role ensuring good management of the house, cleaning, laundry etc.

This new pattern of operation will begin as a pilot initiative, which the Board will monitor closely to ensure that the Coach House remains faithful to its vision and guiding principles and is financially and humanly sustainable. We are encouraged already by early expressions of interest from groups keen to use the Coach House in this way.

We recognise that challenges remain, particularly in building awareness and growing levels of use. To support openness and dialogue, the Board will be hosting an open online meeting on 19 February at 7pm, where we will share more about our discernment journey and future plans, and listen to questions and concerns. If you would like an invitation to this meeting, please use our contact form to request one.

Further information about bookings and costs will be available shortly on this website.

The Board of Trustees of the Coach House has been carefully reflecting on how best to care for the future of The Coach House since the summer of 2024. Our discernment process continues. 

However, we have together taken the decision to pause operation of the Coach House from the beginning of June. This is to enable a ‘radical reimagining’ of its ministry as a space for people to ‘come home to themselves’.

We have taken this decision as part of our financial, legal and charitable responsibilities and maintaining our commitment to the well-being of all involved as staff, volunteers and visitors. It has become increasingly apparent that without some radical rethinking, the operation of the Coach House is unsustainable, both financially and in other ways. This pause gives us time to do this. 

So the offering of events (retreats etc) will pause from June 2025 to provide a time for continuing discernment of the future of the Coach House Kilmuir Trust. 

We will be offering use of the ‘pod’ as a place for personal self-catered retreats. You can find out more using the Contact Us form here. 

We ask for continued support in prayer from the friends and users of the Coach House for the Board and its discernment process. 

March 2025

Annunciation: Julia Stankova. Used with the artist's permission.

Dear friends

As we come to the end of our programme year here at the Coach House it seems fitting to notice that in our letting go and openness to new and unknown possibilities, we are being held and led through the Mystery that is Advent.

In a year of change and challenge, uncertainty, great love, and with the faithful support of our volunteers, the Coach House has been a place of quiet holding and safe harbour for many. The year ended rather unexpectedly when, just days before the final retreat was due to begin, the team succumbed to Covid-19 and made the difficult but necessary decision to close the Coach House doors to guests. We recovered sufficiently by the following week to welcome Nick Helm and Barbara Chandler from our Board of Trustees, and Ruth Flockhart who previously held the role of Coordinator, for a simple yet deeply moving Eucharist to mark Claire’s leaving. A ‘second leaving’ will take place in March next year when we all have rather more energy, and news of that will be sent out nearer the time.

As 2025 beckons and new life begins to stir we will be offering a three-month interim programme from March to May; details of which will be uploaded to the website in January next year. As mentioned in our previous Newsletter, the Board is keen to hear from you and will be reaching out in early 2025 with a survey. We are deeply grateful for your involvement during these months of silent ‘not knowing’ and for those of you who are prayerful and reflective, please continue to wait with us; holding The Coach House and all who care for Her in your thoughts and prayers.  Thank you all for the support, help and time you give to this community.

L to R: Lynn Darke, Claire Starr, Nick Helm, Nancy Billias, Ruth Flockhart, in the Sanctuary after the Eucharist to mark the end of Claire’s time as Co-ordinator at the Coach House. 

“On Wednesday 11 December, Claire Starr laid down her responsibilities at the Coach House after over four years in the role and more than 10 years involvement in supporting the life of this amazing retreat house. 

Claire as co-ordinator has enabled the Coach House to weather the storm of the Covid-19 pandemic, providing oversight and great hospitality for the many who have come for retreat and restoration in the last few years. At the December meeting of the Board Claire’s significant contribution was acknowledged and much appreciation expressed.

Lynn Darke and Nancy Billias who have been on the Coach House staff over the last eight months will hold responsibility for the ongoing life of the Coach House while the Board discern the appropriate shape of the Coach House staff into the future. The Board is wholeheartedly committed to seeing the Coach House’s future unfold, believing it is a special place for retreat and refreshment.

Along with the Board, I want to express deep thanks to Claire for all she has given to the Coach House and to Lynn and Nancy for their commitment as we go through this period of transition.”

Nick Helm, Chair of the Board, Coach House Kilmuir Trust

Many of you will already have heard our important news, but for those who haven’t, we’d like to share the following.  After a time of discernment, Claire, our co-ordinator, has recently let us know of her plan to move on from her role by the end of this year.  In her own words, she explains her reasons for her decision as follows:

Dear friends,

After running the Coach House for four years, I have a deep sense of knowing that my role with The Coach house is coming to an end and it is time for me to move on.  I will, therefore, be leaving by the end of the year. Lynn and Nancy are wonderful team members and it feels the house is in good hands for me to disembark and for whatever is next to evolve in the way it needs to.

Each one of you has been vital in the work of the Coach House and I know I could not have continued without all your hard work and support. You each bring your own unique selves to the work here, each bring a special gift and presence. I very much hope you will be able to continue to offer some time to volunteer and be part of the Coach House as it continues to grow, develop and offer space and safe harbour to all those who visit for however long. While I am not expecting anyone to get in touch with me, if you wish to do so, then please do.

Of course, we are all incredibly sad to say farewell to Claire.  Her wise presence, dedicated commitment and incredible cooking will be sorely missed.  But we also wish her godspeed as she ventures into another stage of her journey.

By giving us early notice of her intentions, Claire has given us the opportunity to discern what this means for The Coach House as we plan for her departure.  We are taking the time to reflect together on what this means for:

• The interim ongoing day to day running of The Coach House;
• The future direction of travel for life in the Coach House;
• The continuing support of and from our valued volunteers;
• How best to mark Claire’s contribution in a meaningful and lasting way.

As matters progress, we would ask you to be mindful of the fact we are in a period of transition and consolidation.  As a result, we do not yet have any concrete answers to the many questions you may have.  We will keep you updated as the process continues but if you have any questions meantime, please email The Coach House in the first instance.

For those of you who are prayerful and reflective, please take time to hold The Coach House and all who care for it in your thoughts and prayers. 

The Trustees of The Coach House

In December last year the Coach House embarked on a period of sabbatical and intentioned discernment. The house remained closed well beyond the end of winter; its usual spring clean and re-opening purposefully delayed. And yet, though seemingly silent and fallow, the ground was being attended to in stillness and patient waiting. 

The quiet darkness gave us the time we needed to gather in and sift the seeds from the years of faithful toil and planting that went before. And over these months we have sensed, and begin now to see, new growth emerging amongst what was already established. For so it is that nothing is ever wasted, and all is honoured and valued.

n February, Claire took the opportunity to walk the French portion of the Camino de Santiago with two volunteers from the Coach House. She began in the French Pyrenées at Saint-Jean-Pied-de -Port. Unfortunately, just over halfway through, she had to stop, in León, Spain, due to a couple of injuries and a decisive bout of gastric flu! Her companions completed the entire journey. In March and early April, some very generous donations - including one from the Inverness Quaker Meeting, we were able to have ground cleared in the paddock at the back of the retreat house, and a base installed there for a new garden room. Another huge - and anonymous - donation enabled us to purchase this new garden room.

A heartfelt thank you to everyone one who made this project possible! In the course of the work, we cleared away a lot of bramble, docks, nettles, hogweed and thistles which had dominated two sides of the labyrinth, and so have finally been able to use Alastair Simmons' wonderful garden design to develop and enhance the space. .

In April a group of amazing volunteers came to spring-clean and/or do some gardening. Some enjoyed it so much that they returned in May, when they were joined by another volunteer. As a result, the three rockeries are now clear and the garden furniture has been sanded down and re-coated in wood preservative. 

Our friends at Highland Mindfulness came twice to meditate and do 'mindfulness in action'. Some planted trees, shrubs, and bushes, scattered wildflower seeds, weeded, mowed the lawns and labyrinth, while others helped with household chores. They are returning in July to paint the new garden room!!

Alongside these returning signs of life has been the slow growth of a new core team, held and enabled in this work by a network of wonderfully loyal volunteers. In recent months (with the faithful support of Ruth - our previous Coordinator - and the commitment of an evolving Board of Trustees ) Claire as Coordinator has been joined by Nancy (our new part-time Administrator) and Lynn (our full-time Assistant Coordinator). Attending to the particularity of their own deep desires and the possibilities being offered, each of them feels drawn to be here; committed to a direction of travel that is both trustworthy and yet to be discovered.

We are now fully back 'in business' and look forward to welcoming you all as and when that is possible for you. Many of our summer retreats have a few spaces still available. Do please get in touch to see how we can best offer 'space for you to come home to yourself'.

Lynn, Assistant Co-ordinator writes:

My training in spiritual direction came about in response to my own deepening faith journey and a desire to walk with others also on the way; a desire that grew naturally alongside my work as a specialist nurse in palliative care. I first came to The Coach House on retreat in 2019, and in 2021 worked alongside Claire for the first time. As a member of the dispersed team of committed volunteers, I made the return journey many times; accompanying others and contributing to the rhythm of hearth and home which The Coach House offers with such generosity.

Since retiring in January 2022 I have been on a long, slow discernment as to where I might best be planted and what I could offer there. Running beneath my own rhythms of silence and prayer, compassionate presence, listening deeply to others, and nurturing my own spiritual growth and formation lies a deep desire to tend to the holy and in the words of Thomas Merton, to listen in ways that help others recognise and move towards wherever it is that God is leading them. And by this same way, I have journeyed here to take up the work of Assistant Coordinator alongside Claire and Nancy.

Nancy, Administrative Assistant

I have come to the Coach House from a lifetime of contemplation and spiritual seeking. After careers in psychotherapy and academia (teaching philosophy), I met Lynn in 2022 when she came to discern at a therapeutic community in Kent where I was living and working. Rather than her joining the community there, I ended up coming north to join the Coach House team!/p>

I’m hoping to put diverse skills into service welcoming retreatants here. My paid role is to keep administrative order (so that Ruth can retire again!), and during retreats I often volunteer in the kitchen. You can find me every weekday morning from after meditation to 11 am, or contact me at: office@coachhousekilmuir.org.

To read the newsletter click here.

Would you like time to rest, read, reflect and recharge?

In a new initiative, the Association for Promoting Retreats (APR) has made a number of bursaries available to support teachers and head teachers across the UK in making a retreat at any APR member retreat house.

The Coach House, Kilmuir is one of the retreat centres participating in this scheme and if you would like further information, and an application form, please apply through us, or contact the APR Administrator.

If you would like to chat to us about how you can visit The Coach House via a Retreat Bursary please feel free to call us on 01463 731386.

As from the beginning of April this year Ruth will be retiring from her role as Co-ordinator of the Coach House, although planning to remain a trustee on the Board. She has held this post since 2016, but previously from 2001 onwards had assisted Joyce Ferne in running the retreat centre. As the person on the ground at Kilmuir she has, sometimes single-handedly, had to deal with all matters concerning the Coach House - maintenance, administrative and housekeeping as well as its core activities of retreats and spiritual direction. At all times she has liaised with the Board of Trustees, who wish to extend their heartfelt gratitude to her for her devotion to the vision and work of the Coach House over so many years. (A word of thanks also to her husband, Mike, who often behind the scenes has been a strong support to both Ruth and the Coach House.) Many Friends of the Coach House will have experienced the gentle and professional way in which Ruth has addressed their needs. So, a bouquet of thanks to you, Ruth, along with our prayers and best wishes for the future.

We are very happy to be welcoming Claire Starr as the new Co-Ordinator. Some of you will already have met Claire as she first came here over 12 years ago, first as a retreatant including making a 30 day retreat with us, then as a volunteer on our team, leading to becoming Assistant Co-ordinator 2 years ago. Caring deeply about offering hospitality in its broadest sense, Claire brings a wealth of experience that will inform and enrich the life and work of the Coach House. We will be seeking to appoint a new Assistant Co-Ordinator to work alongside her when the current circumstances created by the pandemic ease up and the way ahead is clearer.

During the pandemic along with working as Assistant Co-ordinator, Claire has been shadowing Ruth and finding out more of what the role of Co-ordinator entails. To make this possible she has been living on site in the staff flat. This has been a temporary arrangement, as the flat was only intended for short-term volunteers and is unsuitable for long-term occupation. For some time the Board has recognised the need for more permanent accommodation for the Co-ordinator (as many will know, Ruth and Mike live in their own house), and with the co-operation of our partner charity, the Society of Retreat Conductors (SRC), plans are at an advanced stage for a new house to be built on part of the Steading site.

This is an exciting venture for the Coach House Trust, one which we hope will help the current work to continue and enable further growth to evolve.

Planning permission has already been obtained, but we are awaiting detailed costings for the new build and ancillary services, as progress has been severely pushed back by the pandemic. SRC, who are co-owners of the Coach House properties with us, (in the ratio of SRC 67%:CHKT 33%) will of course be sharing the costs, and the bulk of the funding is already secured. However, the Coach House trustees anticipate we will still need to raise £35,000 to complete our share.

The new house will be built on the grassy area in the foreground of this photo (right). The most dilapidated part of the original steadings at the back will be demolished, but the twin gable front and side which are shown in this photograph will be kept for future development.

We are most aware that the current financial situation is a difficult one for many, and that this is not an ideal time to be seeking donations, however if you would like to make a gift now, this would be a great encouragement and tremendously appreciated. This is a link to our page on CAF Donate which provides a facility for secure online donations. We intend to launch a formal appeal in the next few months once we have definite costings. In addition, if any of you have particular skills or ideas on fund-raising, please do not hesitate to contact us.

These last two years have looked so different from each other, with the pandemic having a big impact on our ability to offer any residential retreats or group events for most of the year. This has meant a substantial reduction in our income, and whilst we were able to curtail expenditure associated with hospitality, the everyday overheads have continued. The initial government support grant, and an increase in donations from our supporters for which we are so grateful, have enabled us to come through the pandemic economic storm to this point. In this difficult period we are very thankful for the gifts, thoughts, messages and prayers of our friends which have been, and are, such an encouragement.

Since the first lockdown in March we have adapted to provide some work online with individuals and groups. As with so many others, our zoom skills have shot up. It has generally been a steep learning curve. It was not what we expected, but new insights and opportunities for online work have emerged, which we hope to continue in some way. From August to end of November we managed to offer a small number of retreats for a very limited number of people, following the government guidelines and restrictions.

As I write this there are many restrictions still in place caused by Covid-19, but we intend to offer some retreats this year as and when it becomes possible. Further information about the programme will be on our redesigned website shortly. 2021 will be a year of transition in many ways; as we emerge from the pandemic and it becomes possible to reopen the Coach House doors; as the building work goes forward to provide more accommodation; as Claire moves into her new role and as in time we appoint an Assistant Co-Ordinator to work closely with her and our volunteers.

A big thank you to those who generously volunteer here, whether that has been for a shorter or longer period of time. Your help has always been a vital factor in the life of the Coach House.

We hope you share our excitement about these developments, and invite you to keep an eye on our website www.coachhousekilmuir.org where we will provide further updates about both the progress with the building work and the opportunities on our programme.

Sending every blessing,

David Sutton

Chairman on behalf of the Board of Trustees

p.s. Still serving breakfast – just not to humans!

The Coach House Kilmuir Trust is a registered charity
Scottish Charitable Incorporated Organisation SC029790
Address: The Coach House, Kilmuir, North Kessock, Inverness IV1 3ZG
Email: office@coachhousekilmuir.org
Phone: 01463 731386

In 2018 we welcomed a substantial number of people to participate in a range of our services, from individual retreats or sessions, to group events and workshops. People from far and wide are discovering the Coach House for the first time, through our website, through the Retreat Association, or through word of mouth. We were very pleased, too, to welcome back those of you who have stayed with us on previous occasions. We also welcomed a variety of groups including Highland Mindfulness, Highland Zen, L’Arche, HerSpace, several interfaith groups, as well as various Christian groups from different parts of Scotland. The monthly meditation group has also continued to flourish.

A new facility: the Garden Room

During 2018 we held an appeal to provide a Garden Room as an extra resource for the work here. There has been a tremendous response, – thank you to our many supporters. £7,000 has now been received to meet the costs of this project. The new timber building is situated in a quiet corner of the paddock, with a view across the Moray Firth. It is insulated and double glazed, with electricity for light and heating, enabling it to be used throughout the year. It is already proving its worth as a valuable additional one-to-one meeting space, and has helped us to respond positively to an increased number of individuals seeking spiritual accompaniment.

Running the house, with all its work

As many of you will be aware, the Coach House, overseen by the trustees, is run by a small core team comprising the Co-Ordinator and her Assistant, a part time book-keeper, a part-time caterer, along with a small number of short-term volunteers. Working in this way, through the generosity and commitment of individuals, we hope that as many people as possible will be able to benefit from visiting or staying here. In 2018 our short term volunteers came to help run the house from various parts of Scotland, England, Czechia and Finland, many have also helped in previous years. The garden and labyrinth too have been maintained and much enhanced by the hard work over the year of three local volunteers.

We thank all our trustees, staff, and volunteers, long term or short term, for their important contribution during 2018; together they have greatly enriched the work here and helped to maintain the Coach House and its setting as a place of peace and refreshment.

Changes

Unfortunately two trustees resigned during the year – Reg Holder because of the pressures of his other commitments, and later on, Ian Bonner-Evans, whom we had appointed as Assistant Co-ordinator in 2017. Reg shared his expertise, vision and commitment at a particularly crucial time of transition and development here, helping to steer this charity through all the negotiations, building works and finances of 2014 -6. He spent many long hours working with financial spreadsheets on our behalf! Ian needed to withdraw from the Board and from his position for compelling personal reasons at the end of August. In addition to his trustee work, as Assistant Co-Ordinator Ian brought a wealth of experience, along with warmth, humour and dedication to the team and to the ministry of the House. We thank both Reg and Ian for their tremendous contributions to this charity and its work. We also thank Michael, Ian’s partner, for his help as part time caterer in 2018.

Desmond Ryan tendered his resignation as Patron now that he is no longer associated with the University of Edinburgh. We offer our thanks to him too for his support.
Looking ahead into 2019.

We are very pleased to announce that Claire Starr was invited by the Trustees to take up the position of Assistant Co-ordinator this year to work alongside Ruth, and that she has accepted. Although Claire’s home continues to be in Edinburgh, she will travel up on a regular basis to stay at the Coach House. Many of you will have met Claire already as she has been a volunteer on the team since 2016, accompanying individuals on their retreats and also helping to provide amazing meals.

The Board is discussing the use of the Steadings to discover how they might be adapted to maximise and support the work of the Coach House. There is much potential for the site, but this will, of course, have big implications for our finances.

The programme for 2019

There are opportunities for shorter or longer retreats, or simply for individuals to come to enjoy a restful period for their own well being. For this year only there are no workshops, due to pressures on our small team, but we hope this style of event will return again in 2020.

Thank you for your support.

On behalf of the Board of Trustees we would like to thank all who support us: through gifts of money, time, expertise, and prayers. Your contributions form a vital part of the Coach House life and ministry.

We have produced a new leaflet about being a ‘Friend’ of the Coach House which is available on our website if you would like to learn more.

We hope you will ‘spread the word’ about the opportunities available at the Coach House, and that many of you will be able to visit in this coming year.

With every good wish,

David Sutton, Chairman, and Ruth Flockhart, Co-Ordinator